I was inspired to learn of an amazing thing I am learning now in my life. Things have been busy and I feel like there are hundreds of things going on around me. From every direction there is another adventure that I want to be part of. It has been so hard to choose, so I have taken part of all, and my emotions and body is tired. More than that, my school work is lacking. My grades are not necessarily showing this, but each time I sit to study for a test or to complete an assignment I find that I wish I knew more of the information. I feel like I know just enough to get by. What I am cramming for is not going to stick with me for life, and isn’t that why I am in college, to learn and enjoy what I am learning? The first presidency’s talk, I’m committed, in this month’s Ensign really hit home. This past weekend I took a road trip up to Rexburg Idaho with some friends. We had a blast riding horses, playing games, having a barbeque, and bridge jumping. I need to explain something about bridge jumping. I went to BYU Idaho for my first two years of college before transferring to BYU Hawaii and then here, to BYU. At BYU Idaho bridge jumping is the fun thing to do. Everyone talks about it and many trips are made out to Snake River to feel the thrill of the jump. During those to two years I avoided bridge jumping like the plague. Jumping from those heights and hitting freezing water did not sound appealing.
As we were heading home from the barbeque my friends stopped the car next to a bridge. When I inquired as to why I was informed that we were going bridge jumping. I used my camera as my shield and excuse to not jump. Soon my friends convinced me to put my camera down and at least climb up on top of the cement wall that everyone jumps into the water from. I allowed this saying that I would just take look from that view, but most likely would still not jump. Because of the height I held onto my friend’s hand. He began to count down to jump. I quickly stopped him and made it known that I felt like backing out and climbing back down. He looked at me and then jumped, with our hands still clasped I followed suit screaming the entire way down. When I hit the water I felt the rush that had just occurred. And in those few seconds I realized how amazing it had felt. I got up and did it again. This time fully committed.
In the Ensign talk a very similar story is told. Two younger boys were cliff jumping and one boy was about to back out when the other went, causing him to follow. This story was related to the decision to be committed or not. “Commitment is a little like diving into the water. Either you are committed or you are not. Either you are moving forward or you are standing still. There’s no halfway. We all face moments of decision that change the rest of our lives. As members of the Church, we must ask ourselves, “Will I dive in or just stand at the edge? Will I step forward or merely test the temperature of the water with my toes?” I have been testing the water with my toes with all that am trying right now in life. I need to choose and dive into a couple of these activities that will change and help me become the daughter that God knows I can become.
The history of the church is full of men that made a decision and then dove in full heartedly. An amazing example of incredible men that dove in were the men that volunteered for Zion’s Camp, and then was strong through their trials. When the men first took off on their one-thousand-mile march, only twenty people were ready to go. By Sunday over eighty volunteers assembled in Kirtland. Nearly all of them were young men. Some were fearful of what lay ahead. Heber C. Kimball said, “I took leave of my wife and children and friends, not knowing whether I would see them again in the flesh.” That day the Prophet spoke to the Kirtland Saints before departing. George A. Smith wrote: “He impressed upon them the necessity of being humble, exercising faith and patience and living in obedience to the commands of the Almighty. … He bore testimony of the truth of the work which God had revealed through him and promised the brethren that if they all would live as they should, before the Lord, keeping his commandments, they should all safely return.”
They never had it easy. Food alone was a trial. The men were often required to eat limited portions of coarse bread, rancid butter, raw pork, rotten ham, and maggot-infested bacon and cheese. George A. Smith wrote that he was frequently hungry: “I was so weary, hungry and sleepy that I dreamed while walking along the road of seeing a beautiful stream of water by a pleasant shade and a nice loaf of bread and a bottle of milk laid out on a cloth by the side of the spring.” On occasion the men strained swamp water to remove mosquito larvae, before drinking it.
Some of the men murmured, but the ones that stayed strong in faith and attitude learned from their experience. Zion’s Camp chastened, polished, and spiritually refined many of the Lord’s servants. The observant and dedicated received invaluable practical training and spiritual experience that served them well in later struggles for the Church. The hardships and challenges experienced over its thousand miles provided invaluable training for Brigham Young, Heber C. Kimball, and others. When a skeptic asked what he had gained from his journey, Brigham Young promptly replied, “I would not exchange the knowledge I have received this season for the whole of Geauga County.”
Learning of these men that dove in and were strong I see that the Lord chose from them who He would call to be the twelve that would help the prophet guide the Church. My goal is not to guide the church or become known for my accomplishments. My goal is to make it back to my Heavenly Father being the woman that He knows I can become. I will not become her by staying the way I have been. I need to choose and put effort into the things that I choose to spend my time doing. I need to make those decisions that will change the rest of my life. Right now I am in school and I am finding that I love what I am studying. It is hard and it is a struggle everyday to get it all done, but I love it and I need to dive into it; giving it all that I have. I want to dive into what is truly important. I am committed! 